Attachment style is one of the biggest indicators in how we will have relationships with others. There is a lot of information on what each of the four attachment styles are, but what do you actually do if you have an insecure style and want to change that? How can you actually create secure attachment?

There are a few ways we can do this: through somatic attachment therapy, soothing the nervous system (ie, walks, extreme temperature change), EMDR, and meditation. Attachment based EMDR clinicians are preferable, but if you can work with any EMDR therapist, it will be helpful.

Here are a few resources:


Somatic Attachment Therapy:


Peter Levine book: “Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma”


Somatic Attachment Therapists:

Linda Thai:



Understanding How to Soothe the Nervous System:


This video was for therapists, but if you as a client understand this, it's really helpful:



EMDR therapists:

Amy Sobleman (EMDR and attachment-based EMDR):


Alexis Conrad (EMDR with attachment education):


Rachel (also has guided meditations on the app insight timer):

Meditations under the name Prem Dasi:


To find a clinician in your area: (she educates heavily in attachment reprogramming, highly recommend) (Laurel Parnell, the woman who developed attachment EMDR recommends this website)



Insight Timer App (Byron Katie, David Harshada Wagner, and Lynn Fraser Stillpoint are favorites)

Calm App

youtube also has many guided meditations

One of my favorite spiritual/meditation teachers: